I’m back home with my parents for a couple of weeks – which is obviously the best 🏡. (And yes, I’ve already done the mandatory wardrobe clear out.)

This house is my sanctuary. It has snacks, it has my two favourite people – my parents – who still offer me a glass of water every 25 minutes like I might die of dehydration.

Honestly? I’m questioning why I ever moved out.

Can I move back in? Can I start coming on holidays with them again? Why am I not invited anymore? Weird. I don’t remember being voted out of the group chat 🤔📱.

And before anyone says “but don’t you miss the freedom?” – no. My current life involves paying my own bills, booking my own flights, and occasionally having to make my own dinner 🥴. Here, I just appear in the kitchen and food happens 🍽️✨.

The Great Wardrobe Clear-Out of 2025

Every time I come home, I do a purge 🧹. My room is finally getting to a suitable state – which means I now only own clothes I will actually wear and not “future me” clothes for a personality I don’t have 🙃.

Everything goes to charity … unless I’m home for over a month, in which case I’ll half-heartedly try to sell things on Vinted before getting bored and giving them to charity anyway.

This trip, I parted with:

✨ The furry gilet (tags still on) that I bought after seeing my aunt wear one with black boots 👢. Ordered it, remembered I’m not a furry gilet person. Or a “statement piece” person.

✨ A few rogue high heels I kept “just in case.” In case of what? My own funeral? ⚰️👠

My parents have kindly kept all my childhood furniture, so my old wardrobe now runs like a boutique for the emotionally stable.

👚 One drawer fully dedicated to pyjamas (a fresh set every Christmas Eve, as family tradition dictates 🎄✨)
🧥 One drawer of cosy hoodies and jumpers
👖 One drawer of sweatpants so nice they could be mistaken for “daywear” by someone with bad eyesight
🩲 And my proudest achievement: the underwear drawer glow-up 🚀

The horror-show lace numbers from 2010 are gone (RIP 🪦) – you can read their tragic backstory in Musings from a Mid-30s Undies Crisis: Dead Mice, Disco Pants & Growing Up.
In their place: seamless black thongs, period pants, and bedtime pants that whisper “I moisturise my elbows now” 🧴.

Honestly? This is peak adulthood. You can keep your house deposits and matching wine glasses. I have comfort, stretch, and full pant confidence 💪🩲.

The Storage Situation No One Asked For 📦🍳

Under my bed here is a full Le Creuset kitchenware set 🍲 my parents have bought me over the years “for my house” (that I don’t have 😅). I rent in South Africa, so sadly my Le Creuset era has been put on pause ⏸️. It’s basically my future UK kitchen in storage form 🇬🇧.

Also here: several huge Sophie Tea canvases 🎨 still in their boxes because there’s no way they’re making it to South Africa in one piece. I bought them when she first started painting – pre-‘glitter tits’ fame ✨ – and I love them so much it hurts 💖. She’s massive now, and I’m pretty sure in 30 years I’ll be casually sitting on a Picasso-level fortune 🤑.

Very Important Notes 📝✨

The weather has been unreal ☀️. Proper “sit outside and feel smug about life” vibes.

Saw the prettiest pink flowers on a walk with Dad 🌸. We also picked blackberries!

Tried on my prom dress from when I was 16 👗. Still fits (!!). Slightly big on the boobs now (rude), but otherwise giving full Disney princess energy 👸. Is this acceptable to wear to dinner?

Girlies Go to Ibiza (Wellness Edition) 💃☀️🍹

In unrelated chaos – I’ve booked a holiday to Ibiza 🎉.
Yes. Ibiza. The spiritual home of the 4 a.m. kebab 🌯.

But plot twist: this isn’t that kind of Ibiza trip. My best friend Emily and I are wellness and business girlies 🧘🏻‍♀️📈. We’ve both run multiple businesses and basically plan to get tanned, get fit, and plot world domination (like Pinky and the Brain 🐭🧠) while wearing cute summer dresses 👗.

Emily calls it India 2.0. We went to India together 10 years ago, and this is our decadely trip. We’ve said every year we’d go away together, but boys have got in the way previously. Now? No boys, no drama – just us, living our best lives: pool, tan, workouts, journalling, swapping business ideas, and coming home with a new five-year plan we definitely won’t stick to. ✈️

The issue?

I saw a video on the Daily Mail of a flight from Newcastle to Ibiza and it looked like the prequel to Love Island: The Purge. Someone was drinking Jack Daniels from the bottle before takeoff, people was dancing in the aisle, and I’m pretty sure I saw a hen do doing laps around the cockpit.

Unfortunately, I’m flying from Bristol – which is only marginally less cursed.

And because I came straight from the boat to the UK, my packing situation is tragic. I have two summer dresses and one pair of denim shorts which I absolutely will not wear because denim in the heat is a hate crime. So… I’ll be shopping in Ibiza. Probably for elephant pants, since apparently our resort is in the hippy area.

Manifesting:

🙏 No bluetooth speakers blasting Ministry of Sound at 10am

🙏 No inflatables the size of an AirBus blocking the shallow end

🙏 No “ladsladslads” echoing across the resort like a mating call

🙏 No blokes with third-degree burns insisting it’s “just a bit of sun”

🙏 Just SPF 50, silence, and the quiet joy of not having a hangover

#PrayForGeorgia

Current Obsession: Slow Horses

While I’ve been home, we binge-watched Seasons 1 and 2 in about three days 🍿 and are halfway through Season 3.
Gary Oldman plays Jackson Lamb – possibly the most disgusting character ever put on TV.

He’s rude, unbothered, extremely greasy, and somehow extremely loveable. The energy is: “this man hasn’t washed his hands in six years, but he’s going to solve the case while chain-smoking 🚬 and making everyone feel bad about themselves.”

I respect it 👏.

Home Comforts, Pub Edition

I bloody love being home. 💕 My parents are the best. Today we went for lunch at our favourite pub and had the exact same thing we always have. Mum had steak. Dad had gammon. I had salmon in saffron sauce.

I used to always get the chicken wrapped in bacon with a cream cheese and white wine sauce (divine) but figured I should probably do my 10-yearly meal change. Before that, it was ribs. I am nothing if not consistent.

I also had a Biscoff cheesecake 🍰 with salted caramel ice cream 🍦, which was so good I considered ordering a second one “to go” for the walk back to the car 🚶🏻‍♀️. Parkrun tomorrow will be… interesting 🏃🏻‍♀️💨.

Enjoy your week x